The fact that a man reads The Rubaiyat of Omar Kayem may entitle him to a place in the Inner Circle of the Highbrow, but the fact that Omar Kayem read the Rubaiyat did not please his wife so she waylaid with a broom handle and precipitated him into the sphere of the Persians. And the "Sun that scattered into flight the stars before him from the field of night" brought to the vision of Omar the dancing "Thou" who flirted with the old chap and urged him on. So Omar made her acquaintance, and she suggested a stroll into the woods. Omar was more than willing, but went her one better and urged "a book of verses, a jug of wine, a loaf of bread" and "Thou." So, Omar betook himself to the winery, bought the nectar and told the clerk to take the cash and let the credit go, that his wife would not ask for an explanation when the monthly credit slips came in. Then Omar and "Thou" went out for their little party. Omar rented a chariot that they might ride in splendor. Mrs. K.M. needed her helpful husband, and when she noticed that the old chap was gone, she did a little investigating. To the winery she went, and by dire threats forced the clerk to tell her that her spouse had bought wine for a "chicken." Omar's chariot was stuck in the mud, and its driver could not budge it. Things looked bad, but Omar realized that "tender green might move him from the river lip upon which they did lean," so the old sport kicked in with a few "greens" and the chariot drew like a tractor. And to a cottage in the woods did Omar go, where he told the sweet "Thou" how much he loved her company. Mrs. K.M., while looking for Omar, came across the chariot driver, who was washing the mud from the wheels. A short conversation gave Mrs. K.M. the information she wanted, and the chariot was pressed into service for Mrs. K.M.'s advent at the cottage in the woods. And while Omar whispered sweet nothings to "Thou," Mrs. K.M. was trying to get into the cottage. But "There was the door to which she found no key, and there was the veil thru which she could not see!" But she did find an opening in the rear of the cottage, and through this opening she crawled. Omar was right in the midst of a wonderful outburst when she burst in and the wine jug was hurled at his head. Omar was covered with the wet stuff - but it brought him to - in his own backyard, where a blow from a broomstick had set him back ages! And as Mrs. K.M. dragged him away he made no secret of his mismating and advised that "when we reach the spot where he made One, - we turn down an empty glass!" - Moving Picture World, July 22, 1916